I know I said id blog daily. No matter what. I’m in bed with the flu. Yuck.
Mar20
Monthly Archives: March 2012
Mar18
Fighting With Temptation
I’m very proud of myself.
I turned down money and drugs.
I have a friend that’s a really famous photog who likes to come to town to get high and party with babes. This babe is in for the night watching Quantum Leap episodes.
Like I’ve said, I’m an all or nothing kinda gal!
Mar16
They say addictions hurt
Hello, my name is Anita and I’m addicted to being a living pin cushion.
My face and eyes hurt looking at this nut. Who thinks this looks attractive? I bet her dance card has a wait list. How could you date a person that stabs you in the eye or gives you a new piercing each time u kiss em?
Better her than me!
Mar15
Sleepwalking for beginners
To add to my sleeping problems, I’ve started sleepwalking. I know I need exercise but this is a lousy way to getting a walk in. Last night I could’ve blown the house up. Apparently, I wanted a midnight snack. Through it in the microwave. I woke up as the microwave was popping and the minutes were ticking down. I stopped it at 1:13. I grabbed the bowl and burned my hands. How long was I microwaving a bowl of 7 crackers? God only knows. I’m thinking of putting some baby gates on at the kitchen doorway. Last week I ruined my moms calcium pills because I wanted a glass of milk and in a haze poured myself a nice glass into her pill bottle. I woke up before I got a sip of that.
This all is very maddening. Either I cant sleep or I’m causing potential health hazards by roaming the house in a deep sleep. This has never happened to me before. Any advice?
Mar13
What Dreams May Come?
So while I got a little bit of shut eye I had the craziest dream. If anyone is good at deciphering dreams please let me know what this one means.
Ok, so all of a sudden, in my dream, I’m 9 months pregnant and in labor with my old dope mans baby (I never slept with my dope man) I am totally pissed off about this whole thing in my dream and am wondering why I didn’t take the morning after pill and let it get this outa hand. I keep telling my mom I’m putting the baby up for adoption. She’s mad at me about it (I’m very maternal by nature even tho I don’t have kids I can’t forsee I would put anything up for adoption). After the baby’s born it looks just like the dope man and I can’t stand the baby. I can’t seem to bond with it. My mom keeps looking at the positive attributes the baby has to convince me I actually love it. I hate it. Next scene there’s a fire in my sister’s apartment, yet I live dangerously close to her apt unit (my sister and I have been drug buddies before and I think she’s still using)
I can kinda see what the sister/fire dream is about. I’m afraid to be around her influence? I dunno
The dopeman / baby dream – well the only thing I can think of is even tho I’ve embarked on this new journey I will be reminded daily of the struggle – hence the baby looking just like him?
Any thoughts?
Thanks.
Xoxoxo
Mar13
Batty
Another restless night! I’m going batty! I hate bats. One of my many phobias. Trying to go back to sleep now all I see are bats instead of sheep. 😥
Mar13
Sleepless on the natch!
I lied. I really wanted to write a nice lil blog filled with the guts and glory of my yesteryear but I have been having the absolute worst insomnia. For a girl that used to stay up nights at a time on a meth binge .. You’d think my body would be craving sleeeep! When I started this journey I slept for about a week straight. Of course I woke for meals and a true crime show here and there (I’m addicted to Paula Zahn, 48 hours and the like – my fav stories are about the guy you’d never expect maiming his family) I digress, after I got the sleepless nights outa my system I can’t get a restful night. It’s maddening! I’m up every hour scanning my DVR for a new show pertaining to my fascination mentioned above only to be freaked the fuck out by the dramatic music and dark and intense plot line – I try going back to sleep but refuse to sleep with my back to my bedroom door – I’m thinking irrational thoughts like maybe the guy who maimed his family broke out of jail and is stalking houses of people watching his show only to copycat his killings and make em look like a copycat even tho their the real deal. Hence this vicious cycle of sleepless nights and sleepy days. Did I mention I’m slightly neurotic and phobic?
I took a phenargan, hoping it’ll prompt some real REM. I’ll try to Write a meaningful blog post tomorrow. Yawn. Wish me luck!
Oh, I made this glorious dinner tonight (see picture below) Did I mention I’m
Sorta talented?
Mar12
I’m gonna pull my hair out!
If you have have one of those days where you want to pull your hair out cuz your kids, spouse or imaginary friends are driving you bonkers, take a look at this broad and you may think twice about inflicting a clown wig upon yourself. Oh yeah they have a name for This psychological condition; trichotillomania
Treatments for trichotillomania may include behavior therapy, and antidepressants may be used to alleviate co-existing symptoms of anxiety and depression.
Tomorrow I am going to start writing more about myself .. I think ill start with where my journey began; my journey to crack motels and strange bedfellows and stop making fun of others plight. Well I still might make fun of others and after tomorrow you can make fun of me.. I think I have 2 readers now. I am so awesome!!
Mar11
My Addiction is Better Than Your Addiction III
For $100,000 you too could look like a supermodel cat. I better get a savings account with a higher interest rate. Im trying to set goals people.. Sue me!
Mar9
My Addiction is Better Than Your Addiction II
It’s a monkey, no it’s a cat, no it’s .. A girl with Tanorexia! It must be awful to wear one’s addiction like a badge of honor. Even at my worst, I still looked like the girl next door who loans you sugar or walks your dog when you take a vacation. It’s obvious this girl needs serious help -yesterday! I wonder which as a higher chance of recovery, the girl with the addiction that the average joe can’t spot or the one screaming for help?
Someone get this girl under a shade tree!!
whatsherbox 